What Could Possibly Go Wrong?
Date posted: November 7, 2011
In honour of Jitters, our new comedy that chronicles everything that could go wrong when a small theatre company mounts a new play, we asked our e-news subscribers to tell us their stories about their bad days at the office. Here are a couple of our favourites:
—
I played the part of a German Aristocrat woman in a North American Premier at The Adelaide Court Theatre, TO. (The play was similar to the “Anne Frank Story.”) I smoked with a long cigarette holder and my fellow actor was to take his leather crop and flip it across the holder and cigarette to remove it from my mouth. The Director worked repeatedly with this fellow who couldn’t quite get it right. As luck would have it, on opening night, the crop nicked the red hot end …. it flew UP into the air and DOWN into my cleavage. A secretive “what now?” look came across the faces of my fellow actors. As my skin burned, my immediate reaction to put out the red hot amber as well as stay in character, was to react to the lines, with a dramatic gasp, slapping my palm against my chest. Pain followed, however, my clothing was in tact and I did not become a “crispy critter” on stage. The cast never dropped a line, nor missed a cue and the audience was “non the wiser.” And on it goes:-) – Kate
—
Our teaching assistant who just returned from Mexico has our kindergarten class get together in the gym. She has a special treat. She’d brought a piñata and wants to share the tradition with the class. The problem was she didn’t quite get how the ritual works. She hung the piñata, blindfolded 25 kids then passed out 25 plastic hockey sticks. You get the picture. 25 kids beating the hell out of each other! The piñata didn’t bust until most of the kids were crying or bleeding. I should have given her the heads up but I couldn’t resist. The school board didn’t renew her contract. Too bad, she was a blast! – Christine
—
Newly employed at a costume shop in Calgary at Christmas time, I handed out a “Santa” Costume to a customer from a ranch out in Bragg Creek. Upon checking the details after she had left the store I discovered I had mistakenly given them a sexy Santa’s Helper costume! To rectify the situation, I offered to drive out with the correct costume. It could have been quite amusing – the intended recipient was the somewhat burley bartender! – Donna
—
Many years ago when I was a little student nurse it was suppertime on the ward and all the other nurses went off on their break. I was left alone on a busy surgical ward to check that 30 patients were set up for supper.
I was practically flying from room to room making sure that everyone had received their supper tray.
Room 605. Mrs. Smith had just come back from the Operating Room and was supposed to be “NOTHING BY MOUTH”. Someone had given her a large serving of Beef Bourguignon and she had wolfed down the lot.
“Oh nurse, I was soooooo hungry!” she exclaimed. Seconds later she brought up the whole meal and I grabbed a basin. Cleaned her up and raced to the bathroom to flush the contents down the toilet.
On to the next room and Mrs. Smith was ringing her bell. I dashed back. “Nurse, where are my teeth?” In my haste I had flushed her dentures down the toilet with the load in the basin.
“Fill out an incident report” scolded the charge nurse on her return from break, well rested.
I finally went for my own supper feeling sheepish and stressed.
About an hour later showers, toilets and washbasins all started backing up down the ward, not only on my floor but throughout the whole wing. Floods everywhere!
Mrs. Smith’s dentures were jammed on the main trap for all the drains in that wing of the hospital.
Plumbers were called in; Mrs. Smith was given an appointment in the Dentistry Dept. for new teeth. And, thank goodness, the cost of the damage was NOT deducted from my next pay cheque. – Gemma
—
While functioning as the co-ordinator of Critical Incident Response for a large B.C. School System, I was assigned both a cell phone and a pager. These were a great assistance to me in facilitating this highly important work of responding to sudden deaths, accidents, disasters and general weirdness.
In this role, as one might imagine, I was highly at…tuned to signals of distress of various sorts.
One day, while visiting the main offices of the School Board, I was concerned at the sudden appearance of the sound of an alarm, a high-pitched peeling sound. As I moved through the building, from one floor to the other, it was sounding everywhere! It seemed to be increasing in volume. I noticed however, that there seemed to be little concern or alarm in the offices through which I was moving.
When I asked those I met if they knew what was happening, whether they knew the cause and meaning of the alarm, no one could say. This went on for perhaps twenty minutes, with my concern constantly increasing!
Until…having returned perhaps for the third time to one particular department, someone suggested that the alarm seemed to be sounding only when I was there.
At first confused, then struck with a sudden, and highly embarrassing insight. The alarm was emanating from my belt, whereon hung my pager, protesting loudly that it was about to lose the power from its exhausted battery. I was for a short time a wandering critical incident. – Scott
Upcoming Shows
Latest News
Youth Auditions for Albert Herring and Little Sweep
Sketches from the Diary of an Artist
One Hot Theatre Company + One Belfry Theatre =...
Connect With Us
Calendar
Buy Tickets
Latest News
Belfry eNews